Fear

I've come to realize, recently, that the source of most unhappiness in my life is frustration with myself because I let my fears hold me back. I don't fully commit in auditions and let my guard down, causing me to rarely land a role. I don't seek out relationships with people for fear of being hurt. I don't seek out a better suited job for fear of rejection and never finding one. I've stopped seeking acting roles because of that same fear of rejection. I'm afraid of looking like a fool and I'd really like that to stop. I want to be like those characters I look up to in film, such as Kate Winslet's character in Eternal Sunshine, or Daisy in Spaced.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Spaced

They are these crazy, funny women who struggle with the same issues in life but are not afraid to fall down and pick themselves back up again (I admire the actresses just as much as the characters they play).  I rarely let myself fall, and when I do, I am terrible of shaking myself off and letting that embarrassment go. That has to change.